Tartan update #5: "Punk Goes Classic Rock" can "Dream On"

[Published May 7, 2010]

A better title for the new Punk Goes Classic Rock compilation might have been “Illegitimate Child of the Genre Formerly Known as Punk Attempts Classic Rock (and Fails).” There are a few diamonds, but it’s mostly rough: an insult to both punk and classic rock.

As a general statement, this is a collection of classics for the computer age. One can practically taste the electronics sparking behind the music. Can you say, “hello auto tune?”

At best, Punk Goes Classic Rock is hyper music. Most of the tracks are sped up and played in major keys, which makes them sound way happier than most classic rock is supposed to sound. This is not necessarily a bad thing if you don’t have any emotional investment in the original songs, but since they are classics, most of us do.

At worst? Either the lyrics are obscured by screaming and whining geared toward angsty teenagers, or the artists tried to stick so close to the original that their shortcomings are eardrum-piercingly obvious.

There’s a steady downhill trend in the quality of these covers. Beyond the sixth track or so it’s easy to lose interest, and the album continues for another nine tracks after that. I am more inspired to purchase the original songs from iTunes than I am to purchase this CD with the exception of three or four tracks.

For instance, Hit the Lights fared well with Boston’s “More than a Feeling.” It is a very happy-making cover with soaring, spot-on harmonies and none of this wavering in search of the right note crap. Granted, Hit the Lights could have been one of the auto tuners (one can never tell these days), but at least it sounds good.

The Almost did some justice to “Free Fallin,” originally by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, and We the Kings did well with .38 Special’s “Caught up in You.” The Maine also did a fair job with Def Leppard’s “Pour Some Sugar on Me.”

But things got dicey when people decided to have a go at Queen. Serious attempts to cover Queen should not be made. No good can come of such attempts. Mayday Parade fared decently with “We are the Champions,” but Never Shout Never butchered “Bohemian Rhapsody.”

If these bands had covered these songs live, the reception would have been phenomenal. Everybody loves a sing-along, and everybody can sing along to these songs. Unfortunately, very few will want to if they buy this CD.